Slaying the Jungle Cats

The public have had enough of Big Brother's most infamous game players - the Jungle Cats. Shell's post wedding upset lead to a late voting turnaround, with Victor getting the boot instead of Jason. Jason's unexpected one week stay of execution will please his many fans, yet there is no doubt that he will be given the electric chair this Friday.


The Past week in the house

The loss of Victor was indeed a surprising last minute eviction turnaround - Big Brother'5 is certainly not as predictable as last year (when I got 11/12 evictions correct). Davina noted that Jason was ahead of Victor until last Wednesday's wedding night. Had Shell not reverted to her backup plan C - 'crying for attention and sympathy', Jason would no doubt have got the boot as many had been assuming. 

It is clear from the eviction voting figures for week 8 that the public were very much against not just Slick, but also Jason. This gives us an obvious idea of what will happen in the final 2 weeks of the show.

Week 8 total votes: 1.85 million

Victor : 47.1 %
Jason: 40.6 %
Nadia: 7.2 %
Dan: 5.0 %

As expected, Victors reception from the crowd was pretty mighty feisty in the booing league. However, there was no crowd riot, no one broke through security, stormed the stage, nor attacked Victor. Everything turned out just nicely for the Victor and the overall show. Considering the state of public opinion about 'fight night' way back in Day'20, last Friday's crowd response was really quite restrained.

As has been the case with the other housemates who have been evicted, Victor was also not aware that "...trap jaw...aka Hacksaw Jim Mc'Duggan...." otherwise formally known as Nadia, had previously been a guy. It will also be fun to see how the remaining housemates react Nadia's little secret- although I suspect that Dan is the sole housemate aware of Nadia's past. 

Farewell were the best 'diary room' housemate in BB history.

Awaiting the Baying Mobs : Victor Ebuwa, aka Slick... aka VIC,
 aka the Milkman, aka the Plumber

The Price Fund

A further 3000 was lost from the total this week, which was one of the housemates better weeks so far, ha-ha. The fund now stands at a lowly 53,500. With just one more Saturday task left, I really hope the fund will drop below the psychological threshold of 50,000. This would doubtless frustrate money desperate Shell, which is always a good thing of course. Although I shall note again that I suspect a last week opportunity will be provided from BB, allowing the housemates to claw back a large chunk of their lost winnings through some kind of idiot proof mini-task. Despite everything that has happened in terms of the money, I still think this years winner may yet win more than last years 75,000. 


Nice Day for a White Wedding

I can only assume that BB had expected that Michelle would take swift charge and see that Michelle and her beloved chicken would be the 'dream' couple. Yet surprisingly Stuart drew a line in the sand. He was not going to agree to Michelle's demands on this occasion. The guy has some balls after all !

So, Michelle ends up all in a strop with Stuart from Sunday until Wednesday - much to my own twisted sense of amusement.
I thought that was going to be the end of the wedding day interest, but no....much more was to come, which would have a direct effect on the eviction voting pattern.

Lets be clear about how it things sparked off on Wednesday, and who was responsible.

Victor wakes clearly pissed off with the world.... - he is having one of those which we can all relate to. Michelle even ask him what's wrong, and Victor even explains that he's just having a 'bad day', and Michelle clearly understands how that feels. Victor is not in the mood to talk with anyone, and is certainly not going to 'play along' in the wedding task any more than the absolute minimum necessary to pass it.

The wedding is carried out at 6pm....if only for viewers on C4's Big Brother little Brother to enjoy the delights of Michelle's rendition of 'Pie Jesu' - now one of BB's most infamous vocal moments.

Later, around 8pm things start to go all wrong. BB signals for the bride and groom to begin the first dance. Victor moves to his place..... but no Shell. Shell is off crying with Nadia and Michelle in the bedroom. Victor suggest to Dan that he is being hypocritical about things, since when Ahmed refused to do the task Dan and the others had really tried to get Ahmed to comply. Dan agrees to Victor's suggestion, and goes off to order Shell to dance with Victor.

Mini Gallery

Happy Bride

Shell is happy on her day

Victor insulted

Shell is abusive to Slick

Bride of Dracula

Shell sets her fangs into Victor

Post row chat

Shell talks to an Angry Victor

All hugs again

Pass the sick about fake

See Gallery Week'8

Dan manages to convince Shell to go to the living area - she is boo-hooing still !  Shell then strides boldly to towards Victor and says fiercelt "Victor you're a fucking cunt...but I'm dancing with're a fucking cunt!". Such a polite little rich girl isn't she ? Her parents must be really proud of her, they've certainly taught Shell good manners.

Victor didn't do anything that day to Ms. Nicey-nice, he never said a single bad word against her, and neither did he bitch about her that day to anyone. He merely didn't particularly talk to her that day. For those who have been flying the victory flag for Shell over the past 8 weeks, do they still think she is all sweet and innocent still ? Or are they really seeing Shell for what she probably is, nothing more than a very devious game player who is so desperate to win the remaining money, that she will turn on the tears whenever the right opportunity arises?

I remain outraged at Shell's attitude to Victor (see *). Her whole attitude that day was one of 'me me me', she is seemingly very self-centred and believes the housemates will all kiss her middle class ass. It is a shame that Shell will not get a good booing from the crowd as her pal Vanessa did when she was evicted. We can be consoled though in that at least Shell won't win any of the money. HA!

*I remain no fan of Victor as a result of his attitude on 'fight night', and it must be said he has been great for entertainment purposes. It is just that Shell was so way out of line to him that wedding evening for no bloody good reason. Despite what Shell said to him that evening, at no point was Victor in the least bit threatening to her, as many would like to think he always is to women. Victor was very much the innocent party that night, although perhaps it is Karma biting him back for how he behaved towards dear Emma ? 

Victor:  Verbally abused by 'nicey nice' Shell.


Michelle - bunny boiler, or just a nice girl ?

Dear Michelle, she has been a fascinating housemate to observe over the last 8 weeks. Having lost her best pal Emma early on, she then moved to devote almost her entire time towards her new love Stuart.

I wonder what she would be doing if Stuart had not been in the house, or had been evicted in the early stages. Would she have gone for the 'best' guy in the house, no matter how disgusting he really was? Is she the type of woman that can't bear to be single for more than a day ? The woman who leaps from one failed relationship straight into another, is that who we are dealing with here ? I find Michelle very overly clingy, to the point where she is bordering on 'marginal obsessive' - although some people will just see her as being 'in love' with her new boyfriend. The weird thing is that surely Michelle realises she is living in an extremely unbalanced situation, whereby no one can really be 100% trusted. BB remains a game, no matter how 'nice' some housemates may act with each other, it is still a game, and all 'contestants' are there to see the others get the boot.

As things stand, it looks to me like Michelle and Stuart will be snuggled up close on final night, which in itself could be a bit sickly to watch. My original fear was that Michelle and Stuart might be the final two housemates to choose between, although Michelle has created something of a backlash against her - with her constant attention to her chicken, and it is possible that Dan/Nadia will be opposite Stuart at the very last moment.

For a woman of a mere '23 years', Michelle has done reasonably okay in the house. Dermot on BBLB reported that she has piled on some 16lbs of weight since entering the house, and doubtless Michelle is fretting about this weight gain - although she still looks pretty good (doesn't she?).


Pie Jesu - an infamous moment in BB history

Housemate Assessments

Ψ Dan : Continuing to play a good game, although he has certainly annoyed many of his housemates - in some subtle ways over the last 8 weeks. Having been up for the boot 3 times now, Dan should be sure that the public at like him to at least some reasonable extent. However he was clearly rattled to be up for eviction against Jason, Nadia, and Victor.

Dan should just about scrape through to the final night, Nadia remains his only real adversary to reaching the final night.

Ψ Jason : Despite having survived his first eviction - against his best pal Victor, Jason's time in the house is surely about to come to an end. He has been such an intense character in the house at times...although since BB issued its 'final final final final warning' to him for the 31'st time, he has sunken into a relative slumber.

Jason was very fortunate to get an extra week in the house, but his time is now most definately up. Farewell J.C


Jason: All alone in the house


Ψ Michelle : Many call her the 'bunny boiler', some fancy her..... some just don't care. I'm somewhere in between. I actually think her attraction to Stuart is very much genuine. Despite the fact that her attachment style is VERY clingy, this does not make her such a bad person in my view. I sure as hell would not be able to tolerate Michelle as a girlfriend, she would drive me crazy with all her "...wat ya thinkin chick......tell me... chick...I need to know...". Such comments would make me reach for the nearest baseball bat !

The 'fact' that Michelle has seemingly had sex with Stuart is of no concern to me, or any other 'developed' person. Many indeed have called her a slapper, and claimed she has brought disgrace on her family, but those sexually repressed idiots are to be ignored. If she did have sex in the house, then I just hope she and her lover enjoyed every minute of it, they both seem like reasonably 'nice' people.

Michelle will reach the final night as I originally believed on Day'1....but she won't outlast her chicken, bless.

Ψ Nadia : Annoying to many in the house - most notably the Cats, Nadia has grown in her dominance within the BB house. She has even attracted a significant following in the outside world.

Nadia is so close to reaching the final night, yet I really can't see it happening. The other housemates are more likely to support each other rather than Nadia. If this turns out to be the case, then it is a shame, since Nadia has been one of the more dynamic characters in the house - even giving Jason a mighty slap on fight night. Bless her, although I'm not condoning her 'assault', which in itself justified her immediate eviction from the house.

So, I do not expect Nadia to reach final night... and assume she will be '5'th from last', although that is still a VERY respectable achievement considering all that has happened this series.


Pole-dancing Nadia - will she make it to the final night ?

Ψ Shell : Either she is one of the most sneaky players in BB history, or she is as dull and 'nicey nice' as some have proclaimed. Whatever the case may be, . Taking the 'wallpaper' housemate role, Shell has only ever received 2 nomination votes, which is indicative of her 'sit on the fence' attitude.

Due to yet another of her (regular) crying fits, Shell managed to sway public opinion from the much despised Jason to Victor. Her boo-hooing captured the viewers attention, and somehow swayed public opinion by some 10%. Is Shell really a devious housemate? Are all these tears genuine? If they are real tears, then I find this somewhat bizarre for a woman of her age. Victor never said anything nasty to her on wedding day- the guy never said much to anything that day, yet she goes off to sulk in front of the mirror for 10 minutes, talking to herself about how terrible he was to her.  

Shell will easily reach the final night, yet as was the case for Scott and Steph in BB4, Shell has given the public no good reason for her to win. Shell will be easily forgotten by most viewers, and that is something to be happy about.


Shell Jubin: Still expecting to win BB5

Ψ Stuart : Mr Wilson is now without doubt the most amazing housemate in BB history. With nominations now concluded for this series, it can be declared that Stuart never received a single vote from any of the housemates. The guy is simply the most successful housemate in BB history. Will he manage to win the game though ? I believe he will win it, for the very same reason that I stated at the Day'1 assessment stage - 'the eyes have it'. Stuart will appeal to the teenie texters, and they will doubtless be buying up extra phone credit for the final night eviction.

Stuart to win BB5.

Stuart Wilson: Things are looking bright...and they're only getting better

Nominations: wk 9'

Once again Big Brother has intervened in the nomination process, deciding to scrap the usual final round of nominations. It really has been a bizarre series. The only week where all the housemates had equal rights to vote was in week 7.

Personally I would have liked to have seen a more conventional series in terms of nominations, the whole voting process is always fascinating to observe, and its a shame there was only one week where housemates truly got to vote 'properly'.
Perhaps things will revert to normal..... (dare I mention it) in BB6.

Group Dynamics

Let us take an overview of the remaining 6 housemates.

Group 1: 'the children': ----
Group 2: 'middle people':, Dan, Michelle, Nadia, Shell, Stuart,  - aka, the 'get-along gang'
Group 3: 'the cats' :  Jason

As usual for the end stage of a Big Brother series, the remaining housemates are generally made up of the more 'dull' ones. The only lively housemate left is Nadia, and she has quietened down since the booting of Emma and Marco.

With the loss of one of the Cats', Jason is now entirely alone in the house. I almost feel sorry for the guy. The only time he has been close with anyone recently, was due entirely to having Michelle chained to his wrist. Aside from having the 'bunny boiler' attached, Jason is essentially living out his last days alone. Its all kind of sad, in a lame way.

The 'get-along' gang are carrying on as normal, although Nadia has increasingly shown to be the more dominant of the group. Victor himself challenged Dan about him being afraid of Nadia - Dan naturally declined to answer that question. With Michelle continuing to remain close to her chicken, she is probably quite content in the belief that she will reach the final night - and indeed she and her Stu' surely will. 


Looking ahead

Since C4 decided to go for 5 housemates in the final week, things have developed somewhat slower than was expected.
With last weeks voting showing a very high proportion of the public against Jason, I shall hold to the belief that Jason will get booted this Friday. This will still leave 5 housemates though, which is one too many.

The Final 5 now look to be this....

..... and the fifth player:

We can now assume that C4 will announce a midweek eviction to see the 9'th housemate booted. There is no way BB will have 5 evictions on the final night, surely not ? Unless the final night coverage is going to be considerably longer than last years, then there must be one more public eviction to yet squeeze in.

With the group as it is, Nadia looks likely to be booted - she has consistently picked up slightly more votes than Dan or Shell - who are her relevant rivals. I do wish Nadia would stay above Dan....but the public voting so far does suggest Dan will get more support than Nadia.

Stuart remains steadily on track to win BB5. Facing relatively benign contestants like Dan and Shell- both of whom are largely ignored by the viewers, Stuart has a virtual free ride to the prize. As for Michelle, there is no way she will be supported more than Stuart

With just 10 days left of the series, do enjoy every moment that remains, you are going to deeply miss it, especially after the last of the ghost voices fade away late one Friday night.


Calrissian : Immensely enjoying the show.

Extra note

*I am planning to publish a wealth of BB5 audio (when I get time/energy)... this includes all the Victor diary room classics, a 'fight night' section - which contains ALL the audio stuff you could ever wish for, and maybe even a few 'soundboards' for various housemates.

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Originally Published 2004 Philip Calrissian
Last Updated : 28/07/04